Friend or Foe?

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Do you find there are some relationships in your life you hold onto because the other person makes you feel positive about where you are spiritually?  Not that the person is a positive spiritual influence but rather they are such a mess that you feel better about yourself. 

When I was single, I would say that I had friends on every level spiritually.  Some who were sharpening for me; they challenged me to grow and be more of who God made me to be.  I admit, I had a few friends who I kept around because they always had some issue or drama going on that made me feel a little bit better (why don’t we use the real word? superior) about where I was spiritually.  These friends always presented me with ministry opportunities as well. 

Sunday night, I watched the second half of Joel Osteen’s message on TV.  I admit, Joel’s messages are usually pretty milky (not solid spiritual food).  But I was pretty down on Sunday night.  The day had been stressful.  (Have you ever felt like you need a spiritual detox? )  So I was flipping channels and Joel was on.  He was talking about being a person of accomplishment.  Several things he said stuck with me.  He said your friends should be people who are doing something with their lives.  If they aren’t challenging you to meet and even exceed your potential you should not be friends with them.  Those are some very powerful words.  If you really eliminated people from your life who were not challenging you, who would you be left with?  You would be left with your true friends. 

I’ve had several situations with people who asked my opinion and were then offended with my answer.  But I spoke the truth. The Bible says (Read Proverbs), “Faithful are the wounds of a friend”.  My intent was never to wound.  The Bible also says, “The truth shall set you free”.  By speaking truth into the lives of my friends, I feel that I am being the best friend I can possibly be.  My friends, my closest friends are people who have been willing to tell me the truth even when I didn’t want to hear it.   

Is the person who listens to you and agrees with everything you say really being a good friend to you?  Is the person who always sees your side but never helps you see another perspective really being your friend?  You have to ask yourself, “Who in my life has really been a friend to me?  Who has challenged me to be the best?”.  The person who always agrees with you; the person who goes along with every suggestion and idea you have; the friend who always tells you you’re the best may not be your friend at all. 

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3 thoughts on “Friend or Foe?

  1. my gosh… I can’t stand Joel Osteen but I actually liked that one… If your friends aren’t pushing you and challenging you in your life in God, then all they are is a dead weight…

    of course there are exceptions as in spiritual children, but that’s a different set of rules there and even then your friends should be helping you and lifting up the spiritual child too…

    Jesus was very selective of his friends and I don’t think I have ever seen anyone for having high Godly standards…

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