Ruthlessly Truthful


The other night I was watching the show “Ruby”.  (see )  If you aren’t familiar, the show is about a woman, Ruby, in Savannah Georgia who is on a weight loss mission.  She started out weighing over 400lbs. and so far this season has lost 104lbs.  I’ve been rooting for her to lose the weight.

On this particular show all her experts were meeting to discuss her progress.  Her counselor, swim coach, physical trainer, nutritionalist, doctor, etc.  She leaves the room and they start discussing the situation.  The nutritionalist says Ruby isn’t getting enough calories and nutrition in her diet.  The fitness guy says she isn’t pushing herself hard enough and he would like for her to be on a low carb diet.  They all agree that to some degree she has not been following the diet.  She has told two of her experts she likes the meals but she has told other experts she doesn’t always eat the whole meal…she just doesn’t eat.  The fitness expert and nutritionalist want Ruby to learn to cook and to make permanent lifestyle changes.

Ruby comes back into the room the counselor tells her that she hasn’t been truthful with everyone.  (Typical Southern woman…tell everyone what they want to hear).  She disagrees with him.  She says, “I have not cheated on the diet.”  He tells her she needs to be ruthlessly truthful with herself.  She has not been following the diet to the letter.  She doesn’t see it. 

Those words stuck with me: RUTHLESSLY TRUTHFUL. 

I  had coffee with a friend of mine.  We have a mutual acquaintance who we would like to form a friendship with.  As my friend related one experience she had with this person and I related an experience, we realized – this person isn’t being real.  She has had difficulty making friends and keeping friends because when you are around her you never quiet feel that she is being real.  It’s not the kind of fakiness of trying to be cool or popular – she doesn’t realize she is doing it; it is a religious fakeness.

Oh, I said it people can use religion to be fake.  I had a nice long season of this.   Not really being truthful with myself about my situation and who I was and using religion to hide truth.  You know these people…everything is always good.  They cannot ask for help because you might think they are weak.  Or maybe this describes you.

Guess what usually happens.  CRISIS.  Pure and simple.  Something beyond your control happens.  Then what.  You fall apart.  You finally ask for prayer for help from others.  God created us to need each other.  See Genesis -God said it is not good for man to be alone.  We need each other.  Another writer wrote, “No man is an island”.  My version is there are no Lone Rangers in the Kingdom. 

We must get to a place of being ruthlessly truthful with ourselves.  I do not have it all together.  I need God; I need the prayers of family and friends; I sometimes need to vent.

This is a new year.  GET REAL.  It is time to be ruthlessly truthful with yourself.

Guess what, losing my job has caused me to become a little depressed.  I like working.  Over Christmas, I ate too much dessert (homemade fudge and cinnamon rolls).  I have been watching way too much CSI (tv) and Law and Order.   I am not a very good friend sometimes (I forget to call people back and sometimes I like to be alone).  My house is NOT always clean (in fact, it isn’t clean right now).  I wish I was disciplined and creative enough to write fiction.  I feel that I am not always a good wife.

Now, I am asking myself how can I be more ruthlessly honest in my life?


4 thoughts on “Ruthlessly Truthful

  1. Rob Steele

    Have you ever tried to wake up and knew it was time to get up, but then dreamed you were getting up? You are just aware enough to understand you need to get up but still asleep enough to drift off into the dream and eventually have to wrench yourself into full awareness and get out of bed. So it is with being ruthlessly truthful about anything. Just knowing the issue is great. Even better is understanding what to do about it. But change only happens when we establish a discipline, or procedure that we rigidly follow, that will result in a new lifestyle. Doesn’t matter if it is diet, cleaning, or spiritual concepts. I know this because I also have to die daily.

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