Momlog, stardate June 14th year, 2010 during a.m. blanket time (Play, mommy is busy right now)
So many people tell me they read my “Momlogs”. Which does actually encourage me to write more. So send in your comments. I’d love to hear some of your stories too.
Moms do not really get vacations do they? We have to pack bags, keep an eye on kids under different circumstances in which they continually explore their boundaries, still have to feed the little tikes, clean off their poop (G version) and make sure they get some rest. We went out-of-town for a few days…now I need a vacation from my vacation. Seriously…guys, take your wife away for a few days WITHOUT the children….even if it is just a trip to a hotel (I am thinking riverwalk in San Antonio).
We took a few days off to go to the lake….that was a couple of weeks ago…it has taken me two weeks to recover…now I am back.
Oh, and to catch you up, we now have my 16 year old brother-in-law with us. He is a great kid. Kind of like a grown up version of our baby, very laid back and pretty easy to get along with…still, it always takes me a week or so to adjust. We really, really, really need to get into a house. We would LOVE to find a rent to own deal of some sort (feel free to comment). We need more rooms with doors that shut.
Teenagers are a whole other Momlog… 😀 Of course, I wouldn’t want to embarrass him so I probably will not blog much about it at this time. Although, we had one great incident last summer that now makes me laugh but at the time it wasn’t so funny. I may have to write that one up.
So what is on my mind today? Paperwork. There are tons of it when you have a kiddo you have tons of it. When you foster you have even more and you have make a million phone calls just to get a little help. To complicate matters, all of our baby’s info is in San Antonio and they have never even heard of Kyle or Hays County. I’ve been on the phone all morning and now I need so send several faxes…sounds like a trip to HEB along with waiting in a line with a 2year old (woohoo…maybe I can go right before nap time!).
Many of my readers know that we have been trying to have a baby. When I think about having a little one and a newborn, the idea is a little daunting. I’ve been absolutely dreading the day that we may lose our little guy. Seriously, the thought breaks my heart. He needs someone to fight for him and to teach him how to stand up for himself (that would be me! I am his greatest advocate right now). I rarely say much about his mom, but I’ve seen her in action and rather than teach him how to stand up for himself, she just kind of redirects him or moves him. (Another child pushed him). Meanwhile, I turn into a mamma bear when a child picks him up by his neck and moves him…I’m practically yelling at a 4-year-old, “Where is your mother?” What I wanted to say was a little rougher that what I am willing to write here and contains language that probably shouldn’t be heard by a 4-year-old. Oh, it was a little girl… She nearly choked him. See, I am getting fired up about it right now. I’ve taught him to say “No, No” to bigger kids bullying him…he is little, he forgets sometimes and just cries.
I was thinking earlier this week, if we have a baby, maybe it will not be so painful if he is taken from us but it isn’t true.
I have wrestled with what actions I should take. Should I pray that we can keep him? I’ve prayed for his mom…her situation seems sad to me in some ways but mostly I think of the baby and how I wouldn’t want to send my child back into her mess. He is so stable here. He has love, food, shelter, structure… I am afraid for what situations he may be put into if he goes back. In fact, I’ve been considering giving him a cell phone for his second birthday and teaching him how to dial 9-1-1 just in case. In general he isn’t allowed to play with phones and he doesn’t know his numbers yet so I’m not sure it will work. On the other hand, he is very smart. My decision is to pray for God’s Will to happen , period. God is bigger than the boogie man (sorry, we’ve been listening to and watching a lot of Veggie Tales). God is bigger than this situation and I may think I am our baby’s biggest advocate, however, his biggest advocate is actually God.
God wants me to fight for him. God wants me to fight for him like I would fight for my own flesh and blood. God created me to be a fighter and God sent us this child because he needs someone to fight for him. Fight I will. I will fight in the heavenlies. Whether he stays with us or it taken away, God’s hand is on his life.
Parents need to fight for their children. In this day and age, I cannot imagine sending your child out into the world without praying for them. It is amazing to me that they have so many experiences that we as parents do not know about. We simply cannot be by their side 24 hours a day seven days a week. It is impossible.
Reminds me of something Esther Whitmore told me when I was pregnant…she said, “You have to give your children back to God…sooner or later.” I am giving him to God every day.
Okay, blanket time has almost run it’s course. I was able to write a whole blog. I hear him telling Mr. Potato head, “No, no”. 😀 Now on to picking up all those little pieces.