Life has been so busy. We have been experiencing so much. With twin newborns and a 3 and 1/2 year old, life is hazy…that is probably from the lack of sleep. We are loving the newborns and we are finding grace for the moment.
Last year seemed long. Seriously.
I want to apologize to all my friends and family members who I lacked grace towards when they had new babies. Maybe I didn’t voice it and I hope you didn’t know…I hope my attitude wasn’t sucky toward you. The truth is…babies are hard work. It takes me forever to “get it together” to go anywhere. We have been so tired that things that should be getting done haven’t been getting done to my standard and I’m tired enough that I don’t care.
Last week, only three days after Christmas, a caseworker from CPS (FPS) showed up to pick the babies up and without even asking me how are night was (it had been awful) she looks at our front room (the music room that the children do not even go in) and asked me when I was getting it cleaned up. You see, late on Christmas night, The Hubs unpacked our very full vehicle and put all of our Christmas gifts in the front room. I had not had time to put anything away. My sister was going to come over and help me clean up that day but until then, it was a mess. I came very close to calling her a very nasty name that is close to “witch” and asking her how her house looked three days after Christmas and if she had two newborns who weren’t even near sleeping through the night. But I didn’t. I almost cried, but I didn’t. Then she pretty much treated me rudely until she walked out the door, demanding personal items be sent with the babies although I had already packed them a little bag. When she came back four hours later, she had no comment about the cleaned up room. SERIOUSLY. (And I found out later, she went back to her office and told co-workers that our house was the worst disaster she had ever seen. Which is a lie from the pits of hell because I’ve seen worse homes than ours on many occasions and she goes to some dark places).
FOSTERING IS A THANKLESS JOB. CPS does not respect foster parents or treat them with respect…in my experience. We have had several caseworkers who were so rude to us that we were blown away. (We weren’t the ones abusing/neglecting our kids) And there isn’t really anything you can do about it. If we did complain, the caseworker would be informed and we would still have to work with that caseworker. If anything, I mean anything “goes wrong” (normal things that when they happen with your own kids that require a trip to the doctor) the state launches an investigation against the home and then you (the home) must be cleared. You cannot leave the children with people you trust without those people going through background checks, classes and medical testing….It is insane. I would like to change the law to require all CPS/FPS caseworkers to have had at least two children. I have no idea if the caseworker has had children but she certainly seems to have very impractical expectations of others.
If it were not for the children who desperately need some stability in their lives, I would have told that lady to shove it. I know, not very Christian of me. I can honestly say, today was the first day I cracked my Bible since Sunday. There. I said it. And yet, there is grace for my season.
That’s what I have been learning. THERE IS GRACE FOR MY SEASON.
Just for Fun: Over Christmas, the entire family went out to Carino’s for Christmas Eve dinner. Our normally well behaved boy was pretty good, except I did have to have him move to sit next me because he was giving Pappa (Pop-pop as he calls my dad) a hard time. When the mean ended we were getting all of our stuff together. The Hubs took the Boy his coat. It was cold and raining outside. He told The Hubs he wasn’t going to put it on. So The Hubs told him to take a seat (the seating normally reserved for those waiting to be seated). The Boy started SCREAMING. No tears, just screaming. Which I heard from where we had been seated. I recognized it as our boy and I also recognized it was not a “I’m hurt” scream but a bratty scream. We have a “no tolerance” policy in regards to fit throwing in our family. I took him by the hand and told him to cut it out immediately, which he did. I told him, “We do NOT do that. You will behave and you will LOVE JESUS.” My mom and sister thought this was hilarious. For the rest of the weekend, my sister told the kids to straighten up and “Love Jesus”. I think it’s good advise. 😀 I am just setting the standard…